Tag Archive: resentment

  1. The Impact of Resentment in Addiction and Families

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    Resentment is an emotion most people identify as one that is negative with a lasting impact. It is significant for individuals in recovery from addiction because it can play on the mind and soul of a person who is not able or willing to let go. Resentments build from perceived wrongs or feelings of anger, disappointment and sadness that will not go away. It is possible to learn the impact to repair and restore positive feelings after resentment.

    Resentment in Addiction

    Many people with addiction feel resentment towards an individual. Persistent negative feelings can make a person use drugs or alcohol to cope or escape. Feeling better is only temporary. When a person self-medicates, addiction to drugs or alcohol can quickly take charge. Letting go can feel almost impossible. Continually seeking to cover up emotions with drugs can only lead to further problems.

    Resentment in Recovery

    Quitting drugs or alcohol is not easy no matter who the person is or how long things have been going on. The feelings of resentment can return and even new resentments may open up. The difference is for an individual with resentment that dealing with it is key to staying away from drugs or alcohol. Recovery should feel good but resentment can put up roadblocks in recovery if not dealt with effectively.

    Resentment in Family

    Addiction can cause feelings of resentment to build within a family structure. Families of people with addiction may feel resentment toward the person with addiction for causing the people to have so many bad experiences and emotions it can feel difficult to get free. People with addiction in recovery may have resentments towards family members or feel they individuals don’t trust them anymore. The difficult thing is to work through it as a family and have patience while it gets sorted out over a period of time.

    Overcoming Resentment

    Resentments are feelings that can become addictive and toxic over time. In order to overcome them, it helps to write down the feelings as they arise. Finding peace with not being able to change the past can help when learning that a person cannot control the actions of others. Resentments serve no purpose but to hurt an individual and hold that person back. The constant interference and interruption from resentments can escalate creating further damage to one’s emotional health as well as relationships.

    Counseling and therapeutic support can be helpful. Alcoholics Anonymous or other similar programs are helpful in overcoming issues that arise. Negative feelings feed off one another so can build over time to the point an individual may hurt oneself or others by turning back to toxic behaviors or towards addiction again as a means of coping. With the right support, help and healing is possible over time.

    Sustain Recovery provides a unique approach to adolescent care. Learn more about our programs and how we create long term solutions to adolescent recovery from addiction. Give us a call to get started.

  2. Rehab Aftercare for Families

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    If someone isn’t abusing substances themselves, it may seem silly to accompany the addict to group meetings or counseling sessions. However, it’s not just the addicts themselves who are hugely affected by addiction; it’s the whole family. Family drug rehab help family units learn to work together to keep everyone sober, happy, and productive.

    During family rehab, patients let go of resentment and guilt. They didn’t cause their loved one’s addiction, nor can they cure it. What they can do is educate themselves on the right steps to take and the psychological obstacles that come with tackling them.

    Family Drug Rehab Programs include:

    Family Orientation. You only have to do this once. During orientation a family counselor will teach you the fundamentals of family drug addiction rehab, what to expect, and the costs. You will also have to fill out a questionnaire or undergo a survey to help determine your needs.

    Family Education. A typical family counseling program will involve several weeks of education and meetings, with different topics. Communication, codependency, enabling, and boundaries will certainly be covered, as will the familial nature of alcoholism and other substance addictions.

    Family Rehab Parent Groups. These groups typically meet for several months. Many parents feel that only other parents can understand their situation, so these groups are popular.

    Family Process Groups.  These particular groups are for conveying improvements and setbacks to licensed counselors. In times of concern, struggles, and triumphs, it’s easy to take a misstep.

    Family Aftercare Program.  Aftercare is a broad term for long-term addiction treatment services. It begins while the patient is in treatment and continues for one year after discharge. It takes place in either a group setting led by trained aftercare facilitators or some other sober-minded activity, so long as it demands regular attendance.

    Al-Anon meetings. Al-Anon is a 12-step program for anyone who has been affected by someone else’s addiction, whether or not they have an addiction themselves. AA helps loved ones create a more peaceful lifestyle. They’re completely free and they can be found almost anywhere.

    3-Day Family Workshop At some facilities, short days-long workshops are available by appointment. They’re meant for people just emerging from rehab and are intended primarily to help transition the patient toward some of the more rigorous treatments outlined above.

    Family counseling services are of great importance to us here at Sustain, since we recognize addiction is a family problem. To get started with our recovery services, give us a call at (949) 637-5499 or explore our website for more info on our programs.

  3. How To Forgive The Recovering Addict In Your Life

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    How To Forgive The Recovering Addict In Your LifeHow Do You Forgive An Addict?

    Drug relapse and recovery may be connected, and failure may be the key to success, but the cycle of addiction is so draining, and so disheartening, it can be hard to accept all that. After all of the lies and betrayal, we have a difficult time forgiving, or even wanting to try. How can you truly forgive someone, anyway? Forgiveness feels like saying “No problem, you didn’t do anything wrong.”

     

    What Forgiveness Is Not

    Forgiveness doesn’t mean excusing bad behavior, denying your emotions, or sparing the addict from the consequences of their actions. You don’t have to abandon your pride to forgive. The process of forgiveness may seem difficult in the face of everything you and your family have suffered; however, it’s a vital step for recovery. In order to heal, adolescents must learn to forgive themselves, while adults must learn to forgive them. Otherwise, all that fear, anger, and resentment will keep us stuck in the same destructive loop.

     

    Forgive But Don’t Forget

    Even after adolescents accept the physical, emotional, and financial damage they cause, a dark cloud can loom overhead for the friends and family who tried so desperately, for so long, to put them back on track. If you’re holding onto these bitter feelings, try to understand that they will only hinder your ability to have a full and healthy life. You don’t have to forget the past, nor should you. What you can do is learn the lessons available, set boundaries, and hold to them.  Forgiveness means letting go of the anger inside of you so that you can find inner peace.

    After someone hurts you, it’s natural to want to hold onto that pain as if it’s evidence. You want to show that person how much you’re suffering. But why allow an outside force to dictate how you feel within your own skin? It only hurts yourself.

     

    Forgiveness Is A Journey

    Resentment is not only a waste of time, but a major obstacle to overcome if you wish to achieve your goals. Once you quit enabling an addict’s disease and control your actions and thoughts, your path to freedom will become clearer and more attainable. Just don’t put unrealistic expectations on yourself. If you find yourself holding onto a grudge, at least you’re aware of it and working on it. Resentment is just stale pain; it’s time for it to go.

     

    Interested in family counseling sessions? It’s never a bad idea. Check out our website to get a sense of our available programs and give us a call.  We’ve got solutions for adolescents who are ready to get back into the world after rehabilitation.

Sustain Recovery changed my life in a way I never considered remotely possible. I arrived in a place where I knew nobody. Sustain Recovery gave me tools so that I never had to be alone again. I learned how to live like an adult and have genuine relationships with other human beings. I gained a sense of self respect, love, and pride from the challenges I was given by staff. I was able to work through the recent loss of my father and I achieved my goal of not taking any psychiatric medication.
I learned that life is an endless balancing act. I have to continually work on myself and my relationships with the people in my life. The staff at Sustain Recovery are all incredibly experienced and spiritual. They were available to me whether I wanted their help or not. Through their efforts and experience, I experienced the inner workings of having an intimate, loving relationship with a loving creator.
Sustain Recovery is “home” for me. I discovered a loving, caring family that helped launch me to a place I would have never dreamed and, if I would have dreamed it, I would never have believed I would be able to accomplish it.

K.C.
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